Flirting as a shy or socially awkward person can feel like the most daunting task in the world for many. However, it’s possible! With the right tips, you can give a guy the right signals that let them know you’re interested. How can you effectively engage in the art of subtle communication to capture his attention initially?
1. Follow him on social media
This isn’t desperate or thirsty; in fact, it’s the best way to get noticed without needing to do anything in person. It indicates interest and lets him check you out and see if you have similar people in your network. Once he follows you back, he won’t just realize that you exist, but he’ll get to see how adorable you are and will be hooked!
2. Wear something noticeable
In nature, this is called peacocking. Start that courtship process by standing out with how you dress. If you don’t want to draw attention to yourself in a verbal way, dress uniquely with some looks that make you feel sexy and confident. Don’t blend in with the crowd—rock your own style, and the boys (including your crush) will soon be staring at you as you walk by.
3. Spend time in the same circles or at the same places
If you know he’ll be at a party, go with your friends and find an excuse to talk to each other. The more you’re around him, the more you’ll be on his radar and the more opportunities there will be for some smoldering eye contact and flirty conversations.
4. Perfect your flirty smile
If you catch them looking, it may be easy to get mortified. But flashing your most charming smile is the best way to get noticed. In fact, you’ll probably get a smile back. A smile can transform someone’s face and make them so much more striking, so go for it and smile! Don’t be afraid to practice this with people who aren’t your crush.
5. Say hello
For shy girls, walking up to someone and saying hi can feel scary, but this is one of the most straightforward ways to gauge someone’s interest and guarantee that you get their attention. If this feels too awkward, you can ask him a question instead, like where something is, if they have notes that you can borrow, or something else that makes sense based on what he might actually know.
6. Nudge your friends to bring you up
If you do have mutual friends, they can do you a favor by mentioning your name in passing during a conversation or talking you up so that your crush knows what a catch you are. Of course, make sure they don’t just flat-out say that you like him, since that’s embarrassing and should be reserved for the two of you when you’re alone.
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7. Channel your confidence
Rather than running in the opposite direction when you see him, be confident and walk in front of him with strong eye contact, standing tall. This way, you won’t just show him that you exist but that he would be lucky to have such a confident and self-assured lady in his corner.
8. Text him
For shy girls, texting is a blessing. It’s so much less terrifying than saying something in person, or if you do chat, you can exchange numbers and speak more confidently over text. Texting is personal and can be intimate, but it still gives you time to think about what you want to say, and it’s a low-pressure alternative to face-to-face.
9. Make mutual friends
If you don’t have mutual friends, make them! Being social in a group setting is less intense than being one-on-one with your crush, so putting in an effort to make mutual friends (or hanging out with someone who’s dating someone that’s friends with your crush) can be an indirect way to hang out and break the ice with some casual chats.
10. Laugh at what he says
Of course, context matters here (you don’t want him to think you’re making fun of him), but laughing at a joke or flirtatiously giggling in conversation will help you stand out and let him know that you’re interested.
